i finished reading the five people you meet in heaven, a christmas gift from a friend. it was really good.

i think everyone has their own idea of "heaven," and i certainly know my idea of heaven has evolved over the years. born and raised catholic (for most of my youth, til i stood up to my mom one day when i was 13 and told her i would no longer be attending mass and nearly broke her heart), of course i was fed what i should believe heaven to be. and hell. when i was little, my mom would tell me what hell was like. a place where you are so hungry but you can't eat cuz there's a "force" that prevents your fork from ever entering your mouth, it just keeps getting pushed away from your face. and this image of heaven, it's always white, like you're in the clouds, floating in the sky, an angel wearing a white robe, looking down on the living world... afterall, this is the image that's plastered on tv whenever heaven is involved.

after reading this book, you see a totally different vision of heaven. i don't know what i really believe is heaven, i can't say i even believe heaven exists anymore. but i like the idea that you are once again joined by the people in your living existance, getting questions answered, a sense of closure. but then i snap out of it and think to myself, when you die, you die. that's it. there's nothing beyond that. but a small part of me still wants to believe there is so much more still waiting for me.